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I love your show…..I’ve downloaded all the available podcasts from iTunes to listen to them to & from work …..has been a blessing to listen to your words and guests…and have just found a local group here in Canberra too.
Elaine S., Canberra, Australia.
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Welcome
WelcomeThank you for visiting Childless Not By Choice. I do not take it lightly that you took the time to stop by.
Register now for your free copy of my monthly newsletter!
I help women just like me who are childless not by choice, find joy and meaning in their lives. I want us to live outside the labels society has set for us.
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To view my speaker profile and reserve me for your next speaking event, please click the following link.
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Creating awareness for the childless not by choice demographic on a global level includes bringing knowledge, understanding, and empathy. I naively thought if a woman is simply a woman, she would clearly understand the plight of the childless not by choice woman. Unfortunately, this is not always the case.
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Childless not by choice
Many people stop and think about those four words, hesitant about what to say next. I can almost see their brains processing, trying not to say the wrong thing, in most cases. But really, it is not that difficult. Childless not by choice. A woman or a man for that matter, who wanted but could not have children. The reasons vary: infertility, fibroids, endometriosis, trauma caused by someone else, birth control products that attacked the body. The list goes on!
The bottom line is that childless not by choice means we wanted children but it did not happen for us. And then along with that emotional pain, we had to choose to live our most joyful and relevant lives regardless. If we do not choose joy and relevance, we become a ball of human negative emotions: bitterness, fear, jealousy, envy, even hate. Those negative emotions are not a good option for living your best most relevant and joyful life. In fact I would venture to say that such constant stress on our physical and emotional well being could shorten our lives.
We have heard it all:
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”][et_pb_column type=”1_4″][et_pb_testimonial author=”Kerri B.” url_new_window=”off” quote_icon=”on” use_background_color=”on” background_color=”#8f3f99″ background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” quote_icon_color=”#8156e4″ body_text_color=”#ffffff” use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8156e4″ border_style=”solid” custom_padding=”15px|15px|15px|15px” border_width=”10px” body_font=”|on|||” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”]
Aren’t you glad you don’t have kids?
[/et_pb_testimonial][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_4″][et_pb_testimonial author=”Kerri B” url_new_window=”off” quote_icon=”on” use_background_color=”on” background_color=”#8f3f99″ background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” quote_icon_color=”#8156e4″ body_text_color=”#ffffff” use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8156e4″ border_style=”solid” custom_padding=”15px|15px|15px|15px” border_width=”10px” body_font=”|on|||” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”]
The comments that I find hardest though are that there is no greater experience than being a mother and no greater love than a mother for her child.
[/et_pb_testimonial][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_4″][et_pb_testimonial author=”Linda J” url_new_window=”off” quote_icon=”on” use_background_color=”on” background_color=”#8f3f99″ background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” quote_icon_color=”#8156e4″ body_text_color=”#ffffff” use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8156e4″ border_style=”solid” custom_padding=”15px|15px|15px|15px” border_width=”10px” body_font=”|on|||” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”]
…you’re not a real woman until you’ve given birth!!!
[/et_pb_testimonial][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_4″][et_pb_testimonial author=”Lashonda R.” url_new_window=”off” quote_icon=”on” use_background_color=”on” background_color=”#8f3f99″ background_layout=”light” text_orientation=”left” quote_icon_color=”#8156e4″ body_text_color=”#ffffff” use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8156e4″ border_style=”solid” custom_padding=”15px|15px|15px|15px” border_width=”10px” body_font=”|on|||” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”]
“What is wrong with you?”
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“It wasn’t God’s will for you to have children.”–Civilla
Not cute. Might I suggest that if you do not know what to say, say nothing. Best option always:
Say. Nothing.
Childless not by choice
If that is not your life, enjoy the life you have. Childless not by choice. If that is your life, choose relevance and joy. Choose.
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21st Century Hannah is a podcast show, a series of books, my platform, my Facebook groups. In 21st Century Hannah, I talk to women (and men) like myself, who wanted but could not have children. My goal is to encourage the childless not by choice community realize that we can still live a relevant and joyful life. We believe we were supposed to have children, but what do we do when what was supposed to be does not happen? We have a choice.
Open discussion of childless not by choice is typically avoided. But I believe open discussion is well overdue, so I started the conversation. Come join me!
[/et_pb_blurb][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″][et_pb_blurb title=”21st Century Hannah Devotional” url_new_window=”off” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”%%209%%” icon_color=”#8156e4″ use_circle=”off” circle_color=”#7EBEC5″ use_circle_border=”off” circle_border_color=”#7EBEC5″ icon_placement=”top” animation=”off” background_layout=”dark” text_orientation=”justified” use_icon_font_size=”off” header_font_size=”22″ use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8156e4″ border_style=”solid” url=”https://childlessnotbychoice.net/books/” border_width=”10px” custom_padding=”25px|25px|25px|25px” background_color=”#8f3f99″ header_text_color=”#ffffff” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”]
I wrote 21st Century Hannah 31 Days of Encouragement, a devotional geared towards women (and men) childless not by choice. I wanted to create a way for the hearts of this community to realize someone understands how they feel. I wanted the childless not by choice community to realize that someone out there understands. Someone is talking about it, and writing about it.
I am also working on a 365-day devotional filled with beautiful, interactive content. I cannot wait until it is finished and ready for everyone! And I am working on a novel about my journey through and in the world of childlessness. Stay tuned here for details!
[/et_pb_blurb][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″][et_pb_blurb title=”21st Century Hannah Facebook Groups” url_new_window=”off” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”%%291%%” icon_color=”#8156e4″ use_circle=”off” circle_color=”#7EBEC5″ use_circle_border=”off” circle_border_color=”#7EBEC5″ icon_placement=”top” animation=”off” background_layout=”dark” text_orientation=”justified” use_icon_font_size=”off” header_font_size=”22″ use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8156e4″ border_style=”solid” custom_padding=”25px|25px|25px|25px” border_width=”10px” header_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#ffffff” background_color=”#8f3f99″ url=”https://www.facebook.com/groups/545985648898951/?fref=ts” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”]
My Closed and Private Facebook groups were created as a safe haven for women childless not by choice. These groups are places of refreshment. We share positive posts, words of encouragement, and even requests for prayer. It’s even OK to cry. Believe me, I have done quite a bit of crying over the years. I too, am a woman who is childless not by choice.
Come join one of my groups and let’s talk about living a life of joy and relevance even though we did not have the children we desired.
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PO BOX 451292
KISSIMMEE, FL 34745
civilla@civillamorgan.com
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Affirmations are a wonderful way to daily keep positive thoughts in your mind and in your heart.
They are a way of reminding you how far you have come and what a bright future you have.
Read them daily. Believe what you read, and trust the path you are on.
Download them as a pdf.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″][et_pb_tabs use_border_color=”on” border_color=”#8f3f99″ border_style=”solid” active_tab_background_color=”#8f3f99″ inactive_tab_background_color=”#cfbae2″ tab_text_color=”#ffffff” tab_font=”Calligraffitti|on|||” body_font=”Calligraffitti|on|||” body_font_size=”20″ tab_font_size_last_edited=”off|desktop” body_font_size_tablet=”18″ body_font_size_phone=”16″ body_font_size_last_edited=”on|phone” border_width=”20px” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” background_size=”initial”] [et_pb_tab title=”1.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I am willing and worthy to live my best, most relevant and joyful life.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”2.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I am mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually healed.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”3.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I love me and the person I am becoming.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”4.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I am living the life God planned for me, and He knows best.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”5.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I am thankful for the right people in my life. And I ask them to forgive me for the times when I was not at my best.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”6.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I am thankful for the people who have left my life. And I forgive them for any wrong they did to me.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”7.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]Although childless not by choice, I have a role in life, and I do something toward that role every day.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”8.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]I have created strong boundaries in my personal and professional life. Doing so allows me to live a mentally healthy and productive life.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”9.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]Understanding my path and my role in life means I am no longer taken advantage of by friends and family who believe I have extra time and money because I am childless.[/et_pb_tab][et_pb_tab title=”10.” tab_font_select=”default” tab_font=”|on|||” tab_line_height=”2em” tab_line_height_tablet=”2em” tab_line_height_phone=”2em” body_font_select=”default” body_font=”|on|||” body_line_height=”2em” body_line_height_tablet=”2em” body_line_height_phone=”2em” tab_text_color=”#ffffff” body_text_color=”#8156e4″]My future is bright and beautiful! And I look forward to taking part 100%[/et_pb_tab] [/et_pb_tabs][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_3″][et_pb_code]<iframe src=”https://widgets.itunes.apple.com/widget.html?c=us&brc=FFFFFF&blc=FFFFFF&trc=FFFFFF&tlc=FFFFFF&d=&t=&m=software&e=software,iPadSoftware&w=250&h=300&ids=&wt=search&partnerId=&affiliate_id=&at=1001lphk&ct=” frameborder=0 style=”overflow-x:hidden;overflow-y:hidden;width:250px;height: 300px;border:0px”></iframe>[/et_pb_code][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]
