Selfcare tips for the childless not by choice woman on Mother’s Day
- Do what is best for your heart and your mind. If you do not want to go to a certain event on Mother’s Day, don’t. And you do not have to give a reason. If you decide to go, it is OK to leave early if you become uncomfortable.
- Do something nice for the women in your life who let you be you.
- Reach out to your mom, whether you get along with her or not. Be the bigger person. It will help in your healing process, whether there is a link to your relationship with her and your childlessness, or not.
- Buy yourself fresh flowers. Put them in a place where you can see them, as a reminder of how much you care for and love yourself.
- Get a spa treatment: massage, manicure, pedicure, facial, etc.
- Go to your favorite place–coffee shop, the beach, bookstore, shopping; your happy place.
- Practice positive self-speak. When your mind starts to travel to negativity, self-shame, fear, envy, jealousy, hatred, etc., you do have the power to bring it back to a more positive and healthy place. Choose to do that.
- Create kind but firm boundaries. You do not have to discuss your childlessness if you do not want to. And you do not have to listen to people’s opinions about what you should and should not do in and about your childlessness.
- Be kind to yourself. If tears show up, don’t explain, and don’t make excuses. You have a right to grieve.
- Trust in your journey. Grief comes in waves. Journeys have mountaintop moments, and valley moments. When you know ahead of time that your life, your journey WILL have ups and downs, almost nothing will come by surprise. Be encouraged!
- Join a community like ours, to commiserate and join the conversation with other childless not by choice women. Community is a strengthener. See below for details.
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